Things haven't changed, but it did not stay the way I wanted it to be. I'm bored, and tired, and lonely. Well, what do you expect from a lonely life anyway?

My recent posts had already been sad and daft. I wish I could make things right again, at least I wish I'd laugh because I'm truly happy: i.e. with life, school, home and friends.

At least I found a good song, that kinda fits the situation after I read the aching masterpiece by Sonya Hartnett "The Ghost's Child". The song is entitled Shirtsleeves by Ed Sheeran. I like the words too, not just the music. 

Oh and, Leadership Camp has passed. It was pretty normal, I wasn't very impressed, or genuinely happy, I was mad for a couple of minutes because I can be a bitch sometimes, and wish I bled more if I fell harder so I didn't have to cut my forearm all the time. But then the teachers showed us a video about the raging murder in Palestine, and saw blotches of red cells by the wall and the skin of Palestinian children and decided that these thin line scars shall not be put in my forearms for awhile. A few of the girls noticed the red marks across my hand, they asked me questions if they were cat scratches, or wild weeds' doings, I told them a crooked yeah with a maybe in the end.

After leadership camp was a very tiring weekend as usual. I slept through the whole Saturday, and on Sunday I'd had to help around a lot at this monstrous house. Also, the backyard is getting so fine. The badminton field clean of cracks and fallen leaves, the swimming pool shining it's new tiles screaming I'm almost done!, the walls painted smooth gray, the cute bamboos trimmed perfectly, and the pots of plants put beautifully. 

Tomorrow is school. I don't have enough happiness to go, but I will, because there's this force that tells me that I have to come. It's called Threat and Future. 

I haven't prepared my stuff for school and boarding, I should probably go. It felt quiet nice writing in here, and although I have bored you and made you think I'm trying to keep my "coolness" or "words", thanks for reading.

Goodbye from tired me :)